Misunderstandings in communication can be particularly crushing for touring couples. Time together, face to face, is limited. Pressure is high to get things right during the short time we have, and that pressure amplifies the emotions + blunders + departing views that create miscommunication.
It becomes a bummer cycle, right?!
In our world of creating music, there’s big pride in taking a solo + recording a pass and nailing it the first time…. that’s something to be proud of, for sure. But that fantastic first pass didn’t happen without plenty of commitment and discipline leading up to it.
How we communicate with the people we love is enveloped with complexities: there’s a heart, brain, and a lifetime of built-perception that is receiving our communication, not a mic. Even if we string our words together ‘perfectly’, how they are received and perceived is out of our control.
That’s why asking for another take after a misunderstanding as an effort to get it right is such a powerful action.
- Hey, may I reframe that request?
- I heard you say ___, is that really what you meant?
- Wanna return to this conversation in a bit?
- I’m sorry, I said that with a lot of big emotions that I hadn’t worked through and now I feel more clear.
- May we try it again?
Asking for another chance is also a genuine way to build trust. Acknowledging that we didn’t get it right the first time reveals humility and honesty. If we have kids watching on the sidelines, that’s an especially meaningful lesson for them.
Communication mishaps will happen, that’s a guarantee. What happens next matters most, and asking for a redo is an essential step towards restorative connecting. 🖤
